Bust Out Magazine

Winter 2004

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Silences

by Jo-Anne Rosen

It was Red’s idea to celebrate Velma’s win at the slots with dinner out. The restaurant was priced well above their usual budget but Red had found a coupon in their KOA booklet for a second dinner free. There were fresh flowers on every table, thick linen napkins, candles. It was early in the evening and quiet.

“I can’t see the darn menu,” Velma whispered.

“I can’t hear you,” her husband replied. His voice boomed. She looked around the dark room nervously.

Two tables away a young couple was seated side by side, leaning into each other, talking and laughing, oblivious to anything else.

Velma turned back to the menu. After a while her eyes adjusted.

A waiter glided up and asked if they would start with drinks.

“Decaf coffee,” she said. Red ordered a whisky neat and sirloin steak, well done, with baked potato. That was what he always ordered. Velma hesitated. She wanted something special but the prices were alarming, even at half off. Finally she chose lamb chops.

Red thumbed through his guide to southwestern campgrounds. He was already planning their next vacation. When their drinks arrived he put the book aside and raised his glass. “To good luck,” he said dryly. She raised her cup. They clinked and sipped and then in silence waited for their dinner. They could sit together for hours without speaking, at home or while traveling, and the longer they were married the longer the silences. After Red retired they had even less to talk about.

It didn't bother her at home or in the RV where the TV was always on. Without that companionable background chatter Velma felt uneasy. She peered around the room. The other couple had been served dinner and a bottle of wine in a silver bucket. They were still talking animatedly. And they weren’t so very young, she saw now. They were middle aged. Perhaps they were having an affair? Suddenly the woman glanced directly at Velma. Embarrassed, she turned away.

Red was bent over his whiskey, lost in thought, her gray old man. When he had all his hair it had been the color of flame. To think she had burned with love for him once, and he for her, she supposed.

She thought he might be a little jealous of her win. Now she recalled her flush of pleasure at the casino, how people had turned to admire her and the wild clatter of coins. It had been the most exciting moment in her life, to be so singled out by fortune. She had never been a woman to turn heads.

The waiter arrived with enormous platters. Her lamb chops and a wreath of risotto and greens looked lonely in an expanse of porcelain. “It’s delicious,” she murmured. Red attacked his steak, eating raptly and quickly. They chewed in silence. To her disappointment there wasn’t much meat on the tiny chops.

“I wish I could pick the bones,” she sighed.

“What’s stopping you?”

She shrugged.

“Do whatever you like,” he said mildly. “You’ve earned it.”

Surprised, she looked at him then at her plate. She picked up a bone. The waiter swooped down on them. She dropped the bone.

“Can I get you anything else?”

A shout of laughter erupted from the lovers two tables over. The man was pouring out the last of the wine.

Velma considered. “I think I’d like one of those tropical rum drinks for dessert.”

Red raised bushy eyebrows. He ordered another whiskey.

They clinked again. Velma’s drink was sweet and strong.

“Do you remember Puerto Rico?” she giggled.

“Yeah, we drank a lot of rum in Puerto Rico,”

When Red and Velma got up to leave, the lovers, whispering and nuzzling, were into a second bottle. Velma couldn’t think why she ever in her life had disapproved of gambling or drinking. She hadn’t felt so cheerful in years. But her euphoria ebbed as they drove back to the campground with the radio playing big band music and the silence as familiar as an old dog on the seat between them.


Jo-Anne Rosen is a book and website designer. Her stories have been published in A Room of One's Own, Other Voices, The Florida Review, The Dickens and Roman Candles.

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